Thursday, March 30, 2006

This is the band my son will be touring with.

A BLAST from the PAST
She's waiting on her second child and next month he'll be playing four shows in Vancouver with a band called The Johnsons.

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Happy Birthday Dad

Today would have been my father's 79th birthday. So in keeping with a tradition I started after he passed away I am off to play golf.

Don't forget to tell your father how you feel about him. Hopefully you have a good relationship because no matter what age you are when it happens, losing him really sucks.

Have a good day everybody.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

I am quite grateful to say that I have never found myself in this state.

The materialistic love of my life right after my camera.
I'm in love with my car.
Got a feel for my automobile.

These are my other rings.

Left to right:

"The Thunderstorm" Bisbee Blue turquoise. This ring is always on my right ring finger. If I only have one ring on (like when I'm working) it's this one. I had it made in 1994 and since then it's doubled in value because that particular turquoise is almost impossible to find. Beware of false claims of this. You'll pay US$ 50.00 a carat for genuine Bisbee Blue. These stones were taken out of the Bisbee Lavendar Pit copper mine back in the 1970's.

Abraham Begay inlay. Begay is a hugely famous Navajo jewelry making family. Abraham has a studio in Flagstaff, Arizona. I got this at a bargain price on Ebay. The ring is signed. I wear it on my right index finger when I wear it.

The meteorite. This is a bad picture of this ring but the best shot of the others. What you see as black on this ring is actually nickel colored. The brown that you can make out is brown. This is a slice of a pallasite meteorite that hit Belarus in 1810. I bought this slice a few years back at a great price. Look up pallasite on Ebay and you'll see that now it is quite expensive. This piece of meteorite flew across the universe for who knows how long and from who know where. Now me and it cruise the cosmos together. I wear it on my left index finger.

Memory of Virginia City, Nevada. I bought this light blue turquoise ring in Virginia City because it caught my eye and it fit. I wear if from time to time on my right index finger.

The Thunderstorm and the Meteorite rings were made by my favorite silversmiths. Wizard's Workshop in Tombstone, Arizona.

And you thought I was BEE ESSing when I said I had pink and green on!! I wish I knew how to play that geetar. I used to wish I had a smaller nose until a woman told me about the direct relation between the size of a man's nose and the size of his.....

Monday, March 27, 2006

Thank you Vesper

10 Favorites

Favorite Season: Spring
Favorite Color: Green
Favorite Time: End of work
Favorite Food: Mexican
Favorite Drink: Coca Cola
Favorite Ice Cream: Raspberry
Favorite Place: Tucson, Arizona
Favorite Sport: Golf
Favorite Actor: All time: Burt Lancaster. Current crop: Gabriel Byrne
Favorite Actress: All time: Elizabeth Taylor. Current crop: Susan Sarandon

9 Currents

Current Feeling: WTF
Current Drink: Coca Cola
Current Time: 3:23 PM
Current Show on tv: News
Current Mobile used: Motorola (Fido) but I very rarely have it with me.
Current Windows Open: The two little ones that let fresh air into this room.
Current Underwear: Fruit of the Loom briefs
Current Clothes: Pink t shirt. Green shorts. HONEST!
Current Thought: WTF

8 Firsts

First (and only) Nickname: Neenee (I gave it to myself at 3 or 4 by telling my mom "Me Neenee" and this is the first time I've revealed that to anybody other than family. Mom still calls me that from time to time. If anybody but my mom calls me that I give them the evil eye so just because you know it doesn't mean you can call me by it.)
First Kiss: Elizabeth Rossell
First Crush: Linda the red head in 1st grade.
First Best Friend: Eugene
First Vehicle I Drove: Chevy Caprice Classic (it had a 8 track player)
First Job: Paper route
First Date: Kelly
First Pet: Ranger (a German sheppard)

7 Lasts

Last Drink: Coca Cola
Last Kiss: Wife
Last Meal: Pizza
Last Web Site Visited: CNN
Last Movie Watched: The Inside Man
Last Phone Call: Called mom on Saturday
Last TV show Watched: Pardon the interruption on ESPN.

6 Have You Evers

Have You Ever: Broken the Law: Yes
Have You Ever Been Drunk: Yes
Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn't Know: No
Have You Ever Been in the Middle/Close to Gunfire: Yes
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: Yes. In Utah. In mixed company. AFTER my mission!
Have You Ever Broken Anyone's Heart: Yes

5 Things

Things You Can Hear Right Now: Rush. Traffic. Birds
Things On Your Bed: My belt. Wife's poncho
Things You Ate Today: blueberry muffin, Pizza, Peanuts, Crackers
Things You Can't Live Without: Food and water
Things You Do When You Are Bored: Sleep, Blog, Veg, Watch TV, Day Dream

4 Places You Have Been Today

Blaine, WA

3 Things On Your Desk Right

Coca Cola
Photo album
Junk mail

2 Choices

Black or White: White
Hot or Cold: Hot

1 Place You Want To Visit.

Scroll down.

"cycle ride along the river Thames"

Now I'm sure that is a routine, matter-of-fact thing for Missy to say but do you know what it does to ME?

I grew up in the southwest United States among the legends of Wyatt Earp, Doc Holliday, Geronimo, Billy the Kid, and Pancho Villa. I grew up where most of John Wayne's movies took place. and in fact, minutes away from where many were filmed. I've been to the Grand Canyon, the Painted Desert and the Petrified Forest.

But I long to travel to Great Britain.

I want to sit on a bench and watch the Thames flow by. I want to walk down a street that looks like the streets I see in Coronation Street. I want to hear proper English. I want to hear Big Ben. I want to feel London. Then I want to go out into the country and north to Scotland and over to Ireland.

If where I grew up sounds really cool then you know how I feel about going to Great Britain.

July 2008.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Zona Boy reviews The Inside Man.

Denzel had the same walk as he did in X but he had different clothes on.

Spike Lee repeated some of his techniques from past movies which, for me, borders on being cliche'.

The best scenes involved a kid and cleavage.

The worst scenes involved Jodi Foster and the Mayor had the perfect phrase to describe Jodi's character.

A great robbery idea carried out pretty good on screen with a really good bad guy.

This movie won't win any awards but it's pretty entertaining.

Three fistfulls of popcorn out of five.

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Weekend hit and runs
Above are the two golf balls I spoke about in another post. One ball through the whole round. My two lowest scores ever. An 80 in Douglas, AZ and an 81 in Calgary, AB.
I can understand why a woman would keep her name as a hyphenated last name in combination with her husband's but why do that to the kids giving them two last names?
Gonna paint a mental picture because I had to see it walk towards me and could not run away or scream out. A 60 year-old woman with a really bad haircut and a too small pant suit that gave her a camel toe of olyimpic proportions.

A poem that I wrote some years ago and stumbled on today


As we take our place
In warm embrace
To dance across the universe
In our slow lover's pace

I comment on a star's reflection
And that how, in all my recollection
I've never seen you so lovely

Friday, March 24, 2006

More great movie lines

"What do you faggots want?" Sailor in Wild at Heart when surrounded by street toughs. (they proceeded to beat the shit out of him.

"Twenty dwarves took turns doing handstands on the carpet." Bugsy

"I felt left out." Baby Hernandez describing his experience of hiring three prostitutes at once in Havana.

"If I'm walking into a shit storm I wanna know which way the wind's blowing." Robert Redford in Spy Game.

"Yeah!" Tough guy in a jail cell confronting Billy Ray Valentine in Trading Places.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Okay, how about ten things that EXCITE me?

Joanna Krupa
Thin mint Girl Scout cookies
A new golf ball on the first tee
That same golf ball in the 18th hole
Finding another great subject to shoot
Watching the image appear (old school darkroom)
More than ten comments to a post (okay okay, WOULD excite me)
Pushing the gas pedal to the floor....and holding it there

Explanation of some of the above:

Joanna Krupa is the most beautiful woman I have ever met. In person she looks better than 95% of any of the pictures I've seen of her. I don't know another woman I can say that about.

The same golf ball in the last hole as the one I teed up at the first hole is always a goal of mine. To go the entire round without losing a ball is rare for me. I've only done it a handful of times. Two of those balls are in my bookcase with the date and score. Two others are on my father's grave. I can't recall any others lately. (last 5 years)

My children have explicit instructions that they are to hold a pillow over my face until I stop struggling if, as an old man, I make either of these two fashion statements.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

I love the eyes of a soulful woman because they beckon me to embark on a journey.
I love the smile of a contented woman because it tells me everything is going to be alright.
I love the whisper of an alluring woman because it lays me down in fine linen.
I love the aroma of a playful woman because it spins me around with my arms outstretched.
I love the hair of a dancing woman because it brushes my cares far away.
I love the feel of a giving woman because it makes me feel I'm a complete man.

I love woman.

Slip into soft slumber dreams with me and I will rise as you enter the room.
I will pull the chair for you.
I will summon the violin.
I will feed you from my plate.
I will woo you until the candle flicker fades.

I promise.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

So my weekend is over. Back to work tomorrow.

Monday was a fabulously beautiful day. SUNNY, warm, no wind to speak of.

Tuesday was overcast, cold, windy and threatening to rain all day.

Now guess which day I chose to go get my taxes done and which day I chose to go play golf. Story of my life boys and girls. Arizona got knocked out of the NCAA tourney on Sunday by a number one seed. Oh well.

But the GOOD news is that I FINALLY got that image posted after three days of trying.

GEEZ blogger!

Tagged by Chloe and I'm in a funky mood so here goes,

Ten things the bore me to tears

Paris Hilton
George Bush excuses
Hypocrites at work talking about professionalism
The ocean
Flying in airplanes
Pro basketball
European soccer
Parties, BBQ's, and other such social gatherings

My Personal Dna Report


A BRILLIANT idea by young film makers.

Monday, March 20, 2006

For what this thing costs the BETTER NOT be any damned red eye!

Smelly asked for a pic of my newest ring and here it is. Azurite with some malachite mixed in. It looks dark blue in lower light so you have to be in sunlight to see this detail and hence, the reason I have it. Set in silver and made by my fab jewelry makers, Wizard's Workshop, in Tombstone, Arizona.

Hello, my name is Baron.

Donald Trump is a father again and they decided to balance out the fact that the kid is eternally wealthy by naming him Baron. I mean after all, every kid needs SOME grief in his life.

Never mind that his father will be married to his 7th wife by the time the kid is 20. I mean with a wallet that size and "how would you like to ride to the top of the 'trump tower'" as a pick up line working on every eastern European model.....

I don't think the kid will have trouble in school with that name. His staff of bodyguards might, but not him. Maybe Baron and his rival, a kid named Sheik will hire teams of ultimate fighters to do the dirty work for them.

I'm sure that more children will be forthcoming in this relationship so here's Zona Boy's list of names for the future offspring.

Most (of course with this one the middle name must be, Exalted)

Friday, March 17, 2006

It's late and I'm going to bed.
So just let me say good night to most of you.
Good tomorrow afternoon to Jen.
Good late morning to Chloe.
Good not so late morning to JaG.
I'd say good morning to Missy but I somehow get the feeling she's sleeping St. Paddy's off.
Take two aspirin sweetie.
Did you guys here me laugh when I saw this? I was one of these guys but without the bicycle so let me tell you some urban legends, some humorous stories, and some Mormon mother traditions.
Mormon mothers with daughters about the same age as the missionaries (18-20) love to invite the missionaries to dinner, (members were encouraged to help the guys out by feeding them a meal) in order to showcase the daughter. When I was about that age, some of the missionaries in our ward would comment to me about one particular mother who used to brag about what her daughter's inheritance would be.
Brigham Young University is the private Mormon run school and all returned missionaries are accepted sight unseen when applying to attend. Of course they are swarmed with about a 4-1 girl to boy ratio. They're lucky if they're still single in their third year.
There was the urban legend about the mother who lured a missionary into a room and the quickly locked him in where he discovered the daughter standing before him.......butt nekked.
There was the story that my mission president told us about his companion who went down to the story to by milk, by himself, and fell pray to temptation. That's why you always see the guys in pairs.
Then there was the friend of mine who was being "pestered" by sister missionaries. He shook them one day when they showed up at his door in the morning. He had just gotten out of bed and opened the door wide for them to see that he was wearing only boxers and sporting morning wood. For some reason they never came back.
Several of my missionary buddies married girls they met while we were missionaries. It's not looked upon with much favor to do that but as far as I know all are still happily married. I met my wife on my mission but there was no "set up" whatsoever on her or her family's part. We didn't date until I returned to Bolivia two years after completing my mission. Missionaries dating, of course, is strictly forbidden.
The one sad story is that Miss Inheritance married a missionary who had been a guest for dinner and he ended up being physically abusive to her.

I love you with all my heart

Zona Boy's poll question of the day

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

My new digital Canon is here. I HATE reading manuals but I'm forcing myself.

Power Switch

ON: The camera operates
OFF: The camera is turned off and does not operate. Set to this position when not using the camera.

Any questions so far?

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

My bunions is hurting because.....

I'm gonna be a grandpa again. I worried my daughter when she told me because grandpa's just don't take that news very well I guess.

We worry because we've been there.

We worry because we worried when we were there.

But when I think about it who wants their kids to just have one kid? I like the idea of siblings to protect and fight with. I mean that way they can take turns pushing your wheelchair into traffic.

I love you Jennifer!

I hope it's a girl.

If it is don't name her after your mother because she'll get really mad.

Monday, March 13, 2006

I just posted this as a comment on Krista's blog so I thought I'd share with the two or three of you passers by.

I was down at Boundary Bay yesterday and I had picked something up that interested me. So I'm walking over the driftwood logs trying not to fall on my ass when some dude asks me what I'm looking for.

I don't even look in his direction. I don't feel like conversation.

He asks again.

Again. Not even a look from me.

As I walk away the guy is probably thinking "that guy is RUDE".

No dude, YOU'RE rude. I don't know you and I in no way invited the conversation you attempted to initiate. Do I have a big yellow hat with a smiley face? Do I have a sweatshirt on that has "talk to me" emblazoned on the front?

Leave me the fuck alone. Don't impose on me when I don't want to be imposed on. I'm not below the occasional "go fuck yourself" when cornered into making a comment. Maybe it's because in my line of work people interpret their stupidity as my rudeness so they can place blame on somebody other than the person who deserves the blame, THEM.

I'm sorry about this post but it made me feel better to say it.

I'm antisocial towards most strangers as you can see.

I'm not very "Christlike".

I'm more......well..........


I drove my walk of yesterday in the car this morning to measure. When I walked it I guessed around three miles. The odometer on the car said 6.7 miles. No wonder I'm so worn out today. I need to do that more often though.

It's good to clear my head and after a while I get used to the noise the wind makes blowing in one ear and out through the other.

I like to go blank sometimes.

Okay, I like to go blank A LOT of times.

Many of my blogger buddies have been using songs or poems in their posts so here's a Monday dream from me to you.

Monday, has come around again
I'm in the same old place
With the same old faces
always watching me

Who knows, how long I'll have to stay?
Could be a million years
Of sweat and tears
The rate that I get paid

Diamonds, are what I really need
Think I'll rob a store
Escape the law
And live in Italy

Guess I'll always have to be
Living in a fantasy
That's the way it's got to be
From now on

You think I'm crazy I can see
It's you for you and me for me
Living in a fantasy
From now on


Sunday, March 12, 2006

Zona Boy's list of fave TV miniseries

Bolivar (A Venezuelan TV production from the 80's. I'd kill for a copy)
Centennial (I have the set on VHS)
The Thorn Birds
Band of Brothers
Ken Burns' Civil War

Other TV notes:

Season 2 of Hill Street Blues comes out in May. I was pissed when I got season 1 and saw that they went cheap with double sided discs. Assholes.

I just finished watching season 3 of News Radio. Phil Hartman was murdered during the making of season 4 so it will be interesting to see what they do as far as a tribute when that season comes out.

The Sopranos is starting soon. This should be the last season. It was supposed to have been only four seasons. I wish they would have stuck to that because in my opinion most of season 5 sucked.

So after that last post I'm sitting here when a great idea comes to me.

A walk. (a 6.7 mile walk)

I got a great place around here for a walk.

Down to Boundary Bay.

I get kinda mad because my camera is at work so I can't show you guys my walk.

Next time.

I leave the house and walk south down the road. Cloudless, brisk Sunday morning. 10AM local time. ALL kinds of birds are filling the air with song and the drainage ditch makes the occasional gurgling noises whenever there are rocky places. Muddy fields with standing water as I leave the houses behind.

After a bit I turn east on a road past more farms and over the railroad tracks. That road ends and I turn south again towards the bay. One of my favorite golf courses is to my left. I reach the bay and walk out a bit on the large gray driftwood logs to have a sit and rest for a bit.

Time to head back.

Past the golf course I stay straight to return a different way. I spy a rooster in the bushes. He spies me but he could give a shit about me because what he wants is on the other side of the road. So an age old question is answered. The chicken crossed the road to bang a hen. Then he crossed back because love'em and leave'em don't give me your number because I aint calling.

He's the man.

I soon found out where the chickens came from and soon I'm standing in front of my dream house. A cute little farm house with a yard carpeted with green grass and crawling with chickens. Musta been about 50. Just doing what chickens do. Hens, cocks. A whole damned chicken community. Two roosters start a ruckus and a dozen scurry over to check it out. Then a bucket gets knocked over and chickens come running back into the yard. Fight over. Two cats clean themselves while sitting on a fallen over trash can. I could watch that scene for hours but I walk on. At the edge of the yard I'm scolded by a rooster who gets all "what the fuck you looking at"?

As I walk on I look up to behold three bald eagles circling. One moves off and I watch the two remaining eagles going opposite ways then the same way. I watch for about 15 minutes as the eagles climb higher and continue circling without once flapping a wing. One word comes to my mind as I admire them.


I come upon a house that turns out to be a place that rehabilitates orphaned and injured birds. There are 5 eagles sitting in the large tree. Four males and one female. I live in a place south of Vancouver near a town called Ladner and this place is teaming with bald eagles and I'll tell you boys and girls, it takes my breath away every time I see them.

My walk takes me 2 1/2 hours but was quite enjoyable.

I have to drop my son off at the airport tomorrow. Maybe I'll run it and get my camera.

A lot of times I fantasize about a young Kathy Ireland walking towards me and slowly revealing that she has nothing on beneath her silk robe of dark blue with golden accented detail but what I really want in my life is a Monday thru Friday day job.

Cathy lets the robe drop to the ground, puts her gentle hands on my chest, looks me in the eyes with her beautiful submissive gaze and softly asks,

"why do you want that kind of job?"

I lean my head back and take a gasp of air as her softness reaches my body and her perfume embraces my soul,

"because I miss having weekends off and envy anybody who does."

Saturday mornings are wonderful things. Anticipation of activity that does not include work. Maybe a park. Maybe golf. Maybe shopping at the mall. Maybe the flea market. Do the yard work before the college football games come on. Then out to dinner. Maybe a movie too.

Sunday mornings are glorious. The newspaper. Bacon and eggs. The quiet of the backyard as the light from the sun gets to that perfect spot where all detail is sharp. The birds singing and the occasional dog barking. Most of the world has the day off and it FEELS like a Sunday just like Saturday FELT like Saturday. Sunday is the day to do nothing because doing nothing is the greatest of all accomplishment.

Think of it. If you suddenly became a multi millionaire what would you spend most of your time doing? Nothing?

Sunday off makes me feel like a millionaire.

Kathy pulls me close to her and places the warmest of kisses on my lips and my hands find the small of her back. She looks into my eyes,

"What do we do now my love?"

"What day is it?"

"It's Sunday."

"Put some clothes on. Let's go for a drive into the country. I made us a picnic lunch and I found the nicest blanket to spread out on the ground and a new book of poetry by some guy named Yates."

Thursday, March 09, 2006

The last time I saw Plato he was lamenting
He's always lamenting
I think they invented the word
Just to let me describe the man
He set his newspaper down
And took a long drag on a filterless cigarette
Smoke came out of his nose when he spoke
The dragon effect he sought
"D W" he said in a verbal shrug
"I'm glad Socrates isn't around"
"That was a guy with a wicked temper"
"To go with a hung over disposition"
"I DO have to give it to your generation"
"the women are much more assertive"
"It's a tremendous turn on"
"The submissiveness gets old"
"And those togas covered up the good parts"
Then the waitress set down our orders
It wasn't good when he pierced a yolk
"Over easy my ass" said the old man
"And not even the Mesopotamians,
would serve these hash browns"

In el grande skeemo of things I like to imagine myself standing on a hill of some sorts looking out over a wind swept prairie. I like the silence in the movement of the tall grasses and the caress of the wind on my face.

Things pop up from the grass like a broke down wagon and a ramshackle shack and they remind me of the past. Symbolistic ideals of moments shone in the day but now abandoned. Things once shiny which are now rust. Smiles once welcoming slipped by into the dust.

A shattered window with the tattered curtains screaming like some great crime was committed that went unpunished and a corroded wood burning stove that fails to heat the room long since gone.

When I get quiet time my soul turns into the far northern towns of Montana with their boarded up churches. No more pews or sermons or songs to raise god's glory to the massive empty sky. Dusty sidewalks and broken fences and drawn curtains to keep the blankness outside.

A post office American flag waves as a reminder of those who went away and who's spirits are held captive by far off marble crosses and European soil.

A road lies waiting to take me away but part of me will always tarry here because I like the quiet.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

I ordered a $1,200 Canon Eos 8 megapixel camera the other day. It should be here in a week. I got the greatest deal because I got it through the union at work. The $$$ comes right off the top of my check. It's paid for in a year. No interest. No finance.

I travel in May. Road trip. Two cameras. I'm gonna dive back into some serious photogging. I hope I still have a good eye. You'll be the judge.

I'm still planning my month of silence in August. No words. Just pics. NEW pics. I've been planning something really cool and I know you'll dig it. Just 5 more months.

Stole this from Vesper. Very cool. Pick your fave band/artist and answer the questions using their song titles.

1. Name of band/artist: Steely Dan
2. Are you male or female? Third World Man
3. Describe yourself: Charlie Freak
4. How do you feel about yourself? Kid Charlemagne
5. Describe your ex girlfriend: Dirty Work
6. Describe current girlfriend: Rose Darling
7. Describe where you want to be: Here at the Western World
8. Describe how you live: With a Gun
9. Describe how you love: Night by Night
10. What would you ask for if you had just one wish? Glamour Profession
11. Share a few words of Wisdom: Throw Back the Little Ones
12. Now say goodbye: Home at Last

For me there will never be a cooler band than Steely Dan. Nobody hangs in their orbit. Fagen and Becker are simply the two best musical craftsmen around. Although I think their very best album is Aja, my favorite will always be The Royal Scam. It's dark with biting riffs and lyrics. I will put their song Aja along side any song you think is the coolest as my undisputed champ.

Chinese music always sets me free.
Angular banjos sound good to me.


Some dumbass down at Tim Hortons poured the wrong mix into the hot chocolate and it tastes like CRAP.

You see, I walk down to the other end of the airport for my hot chocolate and donut. I eat the donut but I don't drink the hot chocolate until I get back.

For those of you who aren't familiar the hot chocolate dispenser also dispenses French Vanilla and another powdered coffee. The compartments are separate but if some idiot pours one of the coffees where the chocolate goes.......


Tuesday, March 07, 2006

So I was sitting on the can and I noticed that there was no toilet paper. Who DOESN'T hate that? So I try to get the attention of the person in the next stall.

"Excuse me, is there a spare roll of paper over there?"

For whatever reason she lets out this BLOOD CHILLING SCREAM.

So when I walk out of the bathroom I'm met by two cops. I don't see the problem and I explain that I had to go and the men's side was shut down for cleaning.

I mean really, it's not like I was shaking anything at anybody. The stalls are enclosed so everybody's privacy is assured.

Women are just too uptight at this airport.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Sitting on the roof I can only see half of the next door neighbor's yard. Her little dogs walk in and out of view and are quiet. The neighbor on the other side has fruit trees sporting dark green spheres that are all now the same size but in a few months will become different sizes of yellows and orange. The hop over the wall will put them in my reach when they're not home. They don't mind anyway. Heck, I've been watering the trees all summer like he showed me.

My world is still very small and my close friends are few. One day the world will get big and still my friends will be few. I will always wonder why that is but I will never worry about it.

But now it is time to get down off the roof before dad gets home.

I would grow into a very introspective man who measures time in increments of years and reminisces of smiles and flavors and how he thought it felt even if it was embellished by feelings of longing for the past.

Ten years ago this month I was transported across the country to come to land on a magical spot in South Carolina known as Charleston. The air hung heavy with an aura of surrealism and warm southern charm. Alone in a new place that embraces strangers who invite embrace.

Dinner with friends and a lit cigar as we strolled downtown in the evening. Weekends off like normal people and golf every Saturday.

Charleston was my last long period of adulthood where I was alone. An island in the middle of a marriage and child raising. It may not have been something I was deserving of and it may have been a very selfish thing to do but it was a glorious 4 months.

Zona Boy's Oscar comment

The greatest movie moment in any movie nominated for any award this year was the scene in Crash when the little girl comes running out of the house to protect her father from being shot because she had the magic cape on that he gave her to wear for protection.

That single scene was better than any of the other complete movies nominated and is the reason Crash should win movie of the year.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

Back to work.....

after 4 days off. Two sick days and two scheduled days off. Oh it's so nice to be back on a Saturday when the morons come out to play.

The man, I guess, and his mother who have the same hairstyle. I get the feeling he lives at home. I should have asked why they weren't traveling with their dogs but that might have been considered cruel.

Then I almost get knocked down at Tim Hortons by a baggage handler who can't quite grasp the concept of "exit". Of course it's hard to grasp anything when your knuckles drag on the ground.

Damn this airport and their "No personal flamethrower" rule.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Ten things I'm giving up for lent this year

1. Root Beer enimas
2. Urinating on the tire of my neighbor's car
3. Cat juggling
4. American Idol voting
5. Drinking coke between the hours of 3:12 and 3:13AM
6. Molding my mashed potatoes into "binsk busts"
7. Telling passengers that their airline is "overdue for trouble"
8. Underwear
9. Chasing cars down the street
10. Sitting in shopping carts outside grocery stores and asking single women to push me to their "love aisle"

I bought this pants on ebay. They're too short for me so I'm gonna make shorts out of'em for this summer's golf extravaganza! Guaroanteed chick magnets!!

I may be death warmed over right now but I am certainly NOT a eunuch.

So I head to the doctor but I don't see a doctor I see a nurse practitioner who tells me that I more than likely have bronchitis but there also is the possibility that I am developing asthma. Lovely. (I've had this cough most of the winter)

My sternum is sore from all the coughing but my back if feeling much better. My mucus is draining out my nose now and I have antibiotics to save my wife eventually from hearing my constant whining.

I have an ample supply of Coca Cola and I'm even in the mood to get on this thing so I must be on the road to recovery. The quiz results are making me laugh which causes me to cough which makes my sternum hurt more.

Have you ever had nights where you've had rerun dreams and realized during the dream that it was a rerun you didn't care for and told everybody there you were waking up to go back to sleep to see what else was on?

That was my night last night.

Wow, spell check says I got it right the first time.


Wednesday, March 01, 2006

I got this off Vesper's blog. I failed miserably on hers so I made mine a tad easier.


I have a doctor's appt this afternoon. I told them to have the euthanasia ready.

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