Sunday, April 16, 2006

In a dream I died....

but it was not the end of the dream. I died at the beginning of this dream. I was escorted by a man in a long robe through a dimly lit hallway. The hallway was like no peace I had ever felt in my mortal life. I knew that I was dead but I was not sad for those I had so suddenly left behind. I knew after all that I was going home. The only thing though was that I had a clear vision of all of the good and all of the bad that I had done in my life.

I have a personal belief that we are our own judges when we die. With a true knowledge of what the plan was and who God is and that life is eternal and that our life on earth is but an instant.

I thought that there would be a lot of people around since so many die on earth every instant but I was alone. We reached the end of the hallway and came into a round room with eight doors. On each door was a picture of a person whom I recognized but who I was not related to.

Jimi Hendrix
Groucho Marx
John Lennon
Frank Sinatra
Rodney Dangerfield
Richard Pryor
Raul Julia
Lou Gehrig

The man told me that I was to choose one of the doors and that my eternity waited behind. All of these men had profound effects on me in as far as I wanted to live my life like theirs. I wanted to have their talent, their personality, and in some way and mix it in with mine to make myself better or cooler or well liked by others.

Then I thought about how I had lived my life and how they had lived theirs and what I thought was sin and what was glory. What was known and what lay unknown about them. Had I lived good enough to go through a door into a happy time of their life or a time of deep despair. This would, after all be my eternity. My reward or my punishment. A cry of joy or of sorrow.

Had each of these men found any piece and comfort that I would share? Had I found any true joy or enough good that would balance out the bad in my life?

I chose.

I reached for a door knob and as I touched it I felt a current of electricity rush through my body like some incredible high. Bright light began to rush out but as soon as it had started it ended with dark blue stillness.

Almost instantly I was staring at the ceiling of my room and gasping through a dry mouth to breathe. By the time I got out of my car and began to walk into work I had rationalized it all away.

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